confused.

with life.

what am i doing? where am i going?



i get so frustrated that i don't know. and all of my reactions are less than amusing.

i snap.

with all of this on my mind, you would think that i'd be smart enough to drop a few things or try something different. and i try, to a certain extent.

then i fail.

which leads to more frustration and feelings of inadequacy, uselessness, and disappointment.

in the midst of it all, God is good, right? then why don't i live it out?

i've come to terms that i haven't been right with Him for a while. not that i blamed Him or got angry at Him or asked Him "why?"... more like i've been neglecting Him. i forget He's there. i feel far away from Him. only at complete and utter moments of desperation do i realize this.

but we are called to love, acknowledge, and represent Him at all times. how is that possible when i only turn to Him in times of need?

what the hell am i doing?

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